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	<title>andygroff.com</title>
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	<link>http://andygroff.com</link>
	<description>stuff i lurnd</description>
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		<title>A jQuery Debugging Plugin</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2010/08/a-jquery-debugging-plugin/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2010/08/a-jquery-debugging-plugin/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 01 Aug 2010 07:33:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=247</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Quite some time ago now, I finished my first ever jQuery plugin that could potentially be used by other people. It was this little jQuery debugger plugin and now I am happy to announce that I&#8217;ve created a mini site for it and I will soon release it to the official database of jQuery plugins.
For [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/jquery-logo.png"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-248" title="jquery-logo" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/jquery-logo.png" alt="" width="268" height="268" /></a>Quite some time ago now, I finished my first ever jQuery plugin that could potentially be used by other people. It was this little <a title="My jQuery Debugging Plugin" href="http://andygroff.com/jquery-debugger-debugging-plugin/" target="_blank">jQuery debugger plugin</a> and now I am happy to announce that I&#8217;ve created a mini site for it and I will soon release it to the official database of jQuery plugins.</p>
<p>For almost a year, my jquery debugging plugin has been on my computer, and I&#8217;ve been using it to display variable values with jquery for quite some time now. Although I thought it is useful, I was hoping to improve the code a bit before releasing it. I haven&#8217;t had a chance to improve the code just yet, but I released it anyways, with the hope that it will help someone out there in the world. Here&#8217;s a bit of info about it:</p>
<p>Basically, all this plugin does is display the value or a variable using jQuery. It is a method which accepts a variable as its first parameter, and then it does its best to display that variables value, as well as loop through all the properties of a variable, and display those values as well. It isn&#8217;t perfect, but I do find it helpful. I would keep trying to explain how this can help you debug javascript with jQuery, but I think its better just to view some examples. So, head on over to my <a href="http://andygroff.com/jquery-debugger-debugging-plugin/">jquery debugging plugin demo</a> and test it out for yourself.</p>
<p>Until next time, Happy Coding! Oh yeah, and leave comments if you have any!</p>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
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		<title>Some data on the distribution of wealth</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2010/04/some-data-on-the-distribution-of-wealth/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2010/04/some-data-on-the-distribution-of-wealth/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 13 Apr 2010 02:26:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=238</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/topTaxRates.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-244" title="topTaxRates" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/topTaxRates.jpg" alt="" width="640" height="400" /></a><br />
<a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/taxByIncome.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-239" title="taxByIncome" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/taxByIncome.jpg" alt="" width="719" height="553" /></a><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/inequalityRate.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-240" title="inequalityRate" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/inequalityRate.jpg" alt="" width="719" height="553" /></a><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/wealthDistribution.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-241" title="wealthDistribution" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/wealthDistribution.jpg" alt="" width="690" height="531" /></a><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/nationaDebt.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-242" title="nationaDebt" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/nationaDebt.jpg" alt="" width="719" height="553" /></a></p>
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		<title>SDSU Should Vote Against The Modern Space Referendum</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2010/03/sdsu-should-vote-against-the-modern-space-referendum/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2010/03/sdsu-should-vote-against-the-modern-space-referendum/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Mar 2010 03:48:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=226</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For those who aren&#8217;t aware, SDSU students are being asked to vote yes on a referendum to increase our fees by $94 per semester in order to fund a new “Modern Space Student Union.” I just heard of this recently and checked out the website to see what it&#8217;s all about.
When I first looked at [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/MODERN1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-232" title="MODERN1" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/MODERN1-300x143.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="143" /></a>For those who aren&#8217;t aware, SDSU students are being asked to vote yes on a referendum to increase our fees by $94 per semester in order to fund a new “Modern Space Student Union.” I just heard of this recently and checked out the website to see what it&#8217;s all about.</p>
<p>When I first looked at the website, I found a laundry list of why this is beneficial and necessary. I also saw lots of fancy pictures and, like a good consumer, became excited about the prospect of SDSU having this new state of the art building. I thought I should vote yes on this referendum so that future SDSU students could enjoy this new space which looks quite comfortable, and has the added benefit of being an environmentally friendly building. After I sobered up from the “chance to buy something fancy” consumerist stupor induced by the modern space website, I decided that voting yes on this is a bad idea. Here&#8217;s why:</p>
<p>The new student union will cost an awful lot of money, and I think that, while the new building would be nice, it is not the best way to spend such a large sum of money.</p>
<p><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/MODERN2.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-233" title="MODERN2" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/MODERN2.jpg" alt="" width="267" height="267" /></a>One of the first things I wanted to know is exactly how much this will cost. Sure, its $94 per student per semester, but what is the total cost of the project? I couldn&#8217;t find this information anywhere, so I had to calculate it myself. I found that SDSU has approximately 30,000 students who will be paying $188 per year for 30 years. That means the project will cost us $5,640,000 per year, for a total cost of  $169,200,000. Wow, I thought. Voting for this means voting to extract 169 million dollars from the SDSU student body. After coming up with this large number, I thought to myself, “If I could spend 196 million dollars to benefit SDSU, how would I do it?” Many things came to mind, and in the end, tearing down our existing aztec center and building a new one fell to the back of this list. Here are some ways to spend this much money which are, in my opinion, more beneficial than the new modern space student union:</p>
<h2>Decrease Book Costs</h2>
<p>With this amount of money, over 5 million dollars per year, SDSU could easily buy many copies of every book used in every class and allow us to check them out from the library. Sure, we&#8217;ve got the reserve books, but in practice there are so few copies available that you have to head to the library at 2 a.m. and is isn&#8217;t feasible to get through a class without buying the book. Also, reserve books must stay in the library. If I had this much money to spend, I would devise a system where textbooks can be checked out for special 2 day periods and where there are enough on hand to meet student demand. This way, we would never have to buy another overpriced book, and I bet we could create such a program at a far smaller expense than the new student center.</p>
<h2>Increase Study Abroad Programs</h2>
<p>The associated students have previously decided to increase study abroad funds. This is great in my opinion, but studying abroad still set me back several thousand dollars. Rather than build this new center, I would like to see SDSU take the same funds and make a program where students get the opportunity to study abroad with all expenses paid. Studying abroad, in my experience, creates a bigger and longer lasting impression on a student than any other potential educational experience. America has a big problem of not being able to see beyond our 50 states and I think that increasing our study abroad program would be far more beneficial than a new student center. Would you rather sit in a comfy chair studying in a state of the art building, or fly to Italy and study on the shores of the Mediterranean?</p>
<h2>Increase Merit Based Scholarships</h2>
<p><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/MODERN3.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-234" title="MODERN3" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/MODERN3.jpg" alt="" width="267" height="267" /></a>Most of the students I know, who are not getting a free ride from their well-off parents, are working their asses off to pay for tuition, books, and living expenses each semester. I wonder if all of these hard working students would rather see this tax go into a fancy new building, or have the funds be awarded to the students who work hard and demonstrate academic success. Its unfortunate that students have to come up with so much money to buy their education in our society. The least we could do with a flat tax of $188 per year is redistribute it to those students who show they really want to be here succeeding in school.</p>
<h2>Reduce Class Sizes</h2>
<p>I know that on the web site for this referendum it says we cannot control the tuition which is mandated by the state and how that tuition is spent. This being so, if we were to self impose a 5 million dollar fee increase, I don&#8217;t see why we couldn&#8217;t allocate it to hiring more teachers and reducing class size, thereby ensuring that we get a decent education where we are able to have some one-on-one contact with professors.</p>
<h2>Now is Not the Time</h2>
<p>At the end of the day, I do not think this new student union is the best possible allocation of funds. I think there are numerous things we could do with our money which would benefit students substantially more than a fancy new student union. Just last week me and many other students walked out of class in protest because student fees are raising while our educational experience is degrading. This substantial increase in fees would make our educational experience suck for the next two years, and then it would make it only slightly better once the building is complete. Already, due to state mandates, lower class america is being priced out of an education. Do you think that the highschool student who spoke out last week about her struggle to get accepted into and pay for college would rather fork over an extra hundred bucks each semester for a fancy building, or would she rather be able to afford an education while settling for a less than optimal building? In my opinion, this fancy new building would be nice, but it is irresponsible in our current climate of raising fees and lowering education quality. This is why I say vote no on the Modern Space Student Union Referendum.</p>
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		<title>Need Inspiration? 10 Most Inspiring Youtube Videos</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2010/02/need-inspiration-10-most-inspiring-youtube-videos/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2010/02/need-inspiration-10-most-inspiring-youtube-videos/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Feb 2010 01:54:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=222</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Everyone can use a little inspiration from time to time. Unfortunately, most of the lists of inspirational videos are full of cheesy garbage like Steve Jobs rambling about how he dropped out of college for 15 minutes. This list is different. I&#8217;ve scoured the internet like Sherlock Holmes on crack just to bring these to [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Everyone can use a little inspiration from time to time. Unfortunately, most of the lists of inspirational videos are full of cheesy garbage like <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1R-jKKp3NA" target="_blank">Steve Jobs rambling about how he dropped out of college for 15 minutes</a>. This list is different. I&#8217;ve scoured the internet like Sherlock Holmes on crack just to bring these to you. Check out these ten videos deemed most inspirational by none other than yours truly:</p>
<h1>10. Monsters Get Slain By Ghost Mice</h1>
<p>So, this is one of my favorite bands presenting a great story through the magic of song. If you can get past the singers voice, this one can really make you feel good. Read the <a href="http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858646105/" target="_blank">lyrics</a> as you listen.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wSdPsHO_rNY" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wSdPsHO_rNY"></embed></object></p>
<h1>9. Imagine &#8211; John Lennon</h1>
<p>So I know this is old news to everyone, but honestly, the list would not be complete without it. Its a neat video too.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/-b7qaSxuZUg" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/-b7qaSxuZUg"></embed></object></p>
<h1>8. Playing Guitar With Feet</h1>
<p>I&#8217;ve actually seen this guy at the OB Street Fair a few years ago. He plays guitar with his feet because he has no arms. If you&#8217;re a San Diegan you might have seen him too. He used to perform often at Balboa Park. Anyways, hes better than most people who have hand. This guy and this video are truly awesome.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/KDLvlicXBV8" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/KDLvlicXBV8"></embed></object></p>
<h1>7. Radical Honesty</h1>
<p>Okay, so maybe inspirational is the wrong word for this one, but this guy is really one of the weirdest and for some reason most awesome people ever. Check out Brad Blanton as he presents his radical honesty philosophy:</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Gx-OVdTkwvA" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Gx-OVdTkwvA"></embed></object></p>
<h1>6. Always Look on the Bright Side</h1>
<p>Alright folks, now we&#8217;re really getting into the inspiration department. If this video doesn&#8217;t cheer you up, you might not have a soul. Check out the Monty Python crew doing their thing.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/LxQgXgS5G3c" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/LxQgXgS5G3c"></embed></object></p>
<h1>5. Always Wear Sunscreen</h1>
<p>This one is truly a gem. The best advice ever given is set to some great music. It will make you smile, I promise.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/sTJ7AzBIJoI" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/sTJ7AzBIJoI"></embed></object></p>
<h1>4. Free Hugs</h1>
<p>I know this one has gotten around quite a lot. If you haven&#8217;t seen it yet, you really ought to. 3 minutes and 39 seconds of hope for humanity.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/vr3x_RRJdd4" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vr3x_RRJdd4"></embed></object></p>
<h1>3. Where the Hell is Matt?</h1>
<p>I was shown this video at SDSU before leaving to study abroad. It&#8217;s powerful, fun, and of course inspiring. You&#8217;ll be wanting to do Matt&#8217;s quirky little dance all over the planet in no time.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/zlfKdbWwruY" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/zlfKdbWwruY"></embed></object></p>
<h1>2. We are the World</h1>
<p>So, it was fun to make fun of the king of pop back when he was accused of being a rapist. Now he&#8217;s gone though. Fortunately he left us this gem of inspiration which will make your arm hairs stand up. Featuring the king, the boss, bob dylan, and so many more famous people. Try to name them all.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/jzw6GiqZyD0" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/jzw6GiqZyD0"></embed></object></p>
<p>and&#8230; finally&#8230; the winner of the rice, the taker of the cake is&#8230;</p>
<p>&#8230;</p>
<h1>1. I Dreamed a Dream &#8211; Susan Boyle</h1>
<p>You probably saw this coming. What can I say? This girl is an inspiration to the world. She dreamed her dream and showed the world that dreams can really come true. She was the underdog, she was laughed at, shes never been kissed, she lives alone with her cat (pebbles), and she beat the odds and put the cynics in their places. Much love to Susan Boyle, who inspired me to make this list.</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/9lp0IWv8QZY" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/9lp0IWv8QZY"></embed></object></p>
<p>Thanks for checking out this list. Now go dream some dreams and make them come true. Then, pass this list on to your friends and <a href="http://digg.com/arts_culture/Need_Inspiration_10_Most_Inspiring_Youtube_Videos">digg it</a>. Lets get inspired!</p>
<p>Here are the runners up. They&#8217;re great but didn&#8217;t make the cut. And the last one, well I just like it. Here is a Peace Corps video, an awesome love song, and a song about wine:</p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/6zPwWOGvcbw" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/6zPwWOGvcbw"></embed></object></p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/JOpjdrK1GVc" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/JOpjdrK1GVc"></embed></object></p>
<p><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="425" height="350" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ib_eW9VSUwM" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="350" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ib_eW9VSUwM"></embed></object></p>
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		<title>FBI Agent rallies for the drug war in San Diego Paper</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2010/01/213/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2010/01/213/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 17 Jan 2010 21:10:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=213</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This is a quick post in hopes that some fellow San Diegans will help me send a message to the San Diego Union Tribune. Today they published an article by a San Diego FBI Agent which seems to be rallying folks for the drug war. Obviously there is nothing wrong with publishing any opinions in [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/mexico_drug_war1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-215" title="mexico_drug_war1" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/mexico_drug_war1-300x203.jpg" alt="Drug Warriors" width="300" height="203" /></a>This is a quick post in hopes that some fellow San Diegans will help me send a message to the San Diego Union Tribune. Today they published an article by a San Diego FBI Agent which seems to be rallying folks for the drug war. Obviously there is nothing wrong with publishing any opinions in the paper, but when they publish pro-drug war stances I hope that San Diegan&#8217;s can rally back and tell them that the War on Drugs is not the answer.</p>
<p>Also, something about government officials being directly published in the paper seems wrong to me. The media is supposed to keep government in check, not give them an additional voice, but thats a separate issue.</p>
<p>So, I would love it if anyone who agrees that the war on drugs is the wrong solution would please write a letter to the editor and tell them so.</p>
<p>The article they published can be read <a href="http://www.signonsandiego.com/news/2010/jan/17/next-big-push-drugs/">here</a>.</p>
<p>If you write (please do), send an email to letters@uniontrib.com and include your name, address, and phone number. Below is the letter I sent. Use it as an example if you like. Keep letters short to increase your shot at getting published.</p>
<p>Thats all I have for today. Enjoy the game and Go Chargers!</p>
<pre>I am deeply concerned with FBI agent Keith Slotter calling for the “Next big push on drugs.” What exactly does he have in mind? He accurately notes that high school drug use is declining and that the key to this issue is reducing demand. He fails to mention that tobacco use across the nation is also declining, and that we accomplished this without contributing to the 15,000 people that have been killed in Mexico since 2006 in drug war related violence.

The blood of those being killed just miles away from San Diego is on our hands. This problem will not be solved by stepping up the war on drugs. Instead, lets approach the issue like we approach tobacco, with a system of regulation and education. We can solve our drug problem without killing thousands and incarcerating millions.

Andrew P. Groff
Address
Phone #</pre>
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		<title>I Lurnd What&#8217;s Important</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2010/01/i-lurnd-whats-important/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2010/01/i-lurnd-whats-important/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 15 Jan 2010 04:24:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=197</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Today I&#8217;ve been doing a bit of reflecting. I&#8217;ve been thinking about what is going on in Haiti right now and also about what is important in my own life. I just wanted to take this opportunity to say a few words about Haiti and then to share some information about myself, which I&#8217;ve been [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/god.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-199" title="god" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/god-300x160.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="160" /></a>Today I&#8217;ve been doing a bit of reflecting. I&#8217;ve been thinking about what is going on in Haiti right now and also about what is important in my own life. I just wanted to take this opportunity to say a few words about Haiti and then to share some information about myself, which I&#8217;ve been writing in preparation for an online resume and portfolio I&#8217;ve been working on. No sardonic attempts at satire today, my friends. Just a few sincere words and then a personal bio to let everyone know more about my life, my interests, and my dreams.</p>
<p><a href="http://globalvoicesonline.org/2010/01/14/caribbean-helping-haiti/">What is happening now in Haiti</a> is hard to bear and impossible to understand. I can&#8217;t help but consider the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Problem_of_evil#Logical_problem_of_evil">philosophical problem of evil</a> and wonder why these types of things happen. An estimate is putting casualties in the tens of thousands. That&#8217;s three times the tragedy of 9/11 and we can&#8217;t even blame the terrorists. This tragedy has got me thinking about many things, like why people can cry during the notebook and simply change the channel during this earthquake. I cannot help but try to imagine myself in the position of the thousands of real human beings who lost their wives and kids and parents in the last 48 hours. I wonder how it would feel to walk down the street you grew up on and see your neighbour&#8217;s bodies covered by blankets. In the end, I keep being led back to the question of &#8220;Why?&#8221; What reason is there for so much pain and suffering?</p>
<p>Of course, I know that asking why is useless. There is no reason and their doesn&#8217;t need to be. Nonetheless, its a hard thought to deal with. If anything good can come of this situation, perhaps it can help give those of us who are unaffected a different perspective on life. Perhaps it can help people like myself be grateful for the things we have and the things we take for granted; such as family, food, a decent house, and access to healthcare (even if it is a bit too expensive). When you see a child being pulled out of a pile of rubble, all of a sudden unemployment, taxes, and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-16u9x3tfE">all the other garbage Glenn Beck rants about</a> seems pretty insignificant.</p>
<div id="attachment_201" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px"><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/hiati.jpeg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-201" title="hiati" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/hiati-300x220.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="220" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">A shot from Haiti (Reuters)</p></div>
<p>Although it is certainly important to try to improve our country, recent happenings in Haiti have served as a reminder to me that in the grand scheme of things, we really haven&#8217;t got much room to complain. That being said, I want to encourage everyone to keep Haiti in your thoughts and to hope for the best. I think this is a good opportunity for everyone open their eyes, look around, and realize all we have to be grateful for. Having food, friends, a cozy place to sleep, and all of your limbs is really quite the little blessing. Pray if you do that, <a href="http://www.faceoff.com/hockey/teams/montreal-canadiens/story.html?id=2437555">help</a> if you can. Thats really all I can say for now about Haiti.</p>
<p>The rest of this post is about me, so stop reading now if you&#8217;re not interested.</p>
<p>During the last two days, I&#8217;ve been working on an interactive, online portfolio and job resume, in hopes of getting hired soon. That online resume is not ready yet, and I&#8217;ll certainly post about it when it is. But, I did finish writing the &#8220;about me&#8221; section and that is what I would like to share today. I realize that some people read this blog who don&#8217;t know me particularly well, and that my attempts at satire, dry humor, and the generally sardonic tone I take on can sometimes be misconstrued as my honest opinion &#8211; which is almost never presented here.</p>
<p>So, for anyone who cares, here are some sincere words about what I think is valuable in life, what my dreams are, and what I am passionate about. Enjoy, and feel free to comment or email me if ever you have any questions. Here it is, straight out of the &#8220;about me&#8221; section of my newest work:</p>
<h2>the important stuff:</h2>
<div id="attachment_203" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 310px"><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/brugge.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-203" title="brugge" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/brugge-300x207.jpg" alt="A nice canal in Brugge, Belgium" width="300" height="207" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">A nice canal in Brugge, Belgium</p></div>
<p>I&#8217;m not a fan of representing people with numbers, titles, locations, occupations, and statistics. Here&#8217;s some of the more important info about me:</p>
<p>I&#8217;m passionate about traveling, writing, music, programming, meeting new people, learning, and sharing good times with great friends. I love coffee and exotic foods. I like philosophy and reading books which can alter a persons perspective of life. On a sunny day I like to ride my unicycle or relax in the park with a glass of wine. There are two truly defining moments in my life where I learned how lucky we all are to be alive and what kind of things are important in life.</p>
<p>First, there was the road trip I took with my friends to Tennessee. We drove for 12 to 16 hours a day, spending short yet fun nights in hotels accross the country, until we finally arived at Bonnaroo — our destination. There we spent four days hanging out, meeting people, and watching the best musicians in the country perform live. After an exhausting stay, we packed up and headed home. This was an amazing experience. It helped me open my eyes to the size of the world and showed me the importance of having some of the best friends a person could ever hope for.</p>
<div id="attachment_205" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px"><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/spainOlives.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-205" title="spainOlives" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/spainOlives-300x225.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="225" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Eating olives in Almeria, Spain. </p></div>
<p>The second experience that changed my life and helped turn me into who I am today was when I studied abroad in the spring of 2009. I got to spend 5 months living in a small city in the Netherlands called Maastricht. This opened my eyes more than I ever could have imagined. Experiencing the world from outside of the American perspective shaped me dramatically and will forever reserve a special place in my heart. During my stay I travelled through Spain and Italy and visited Germany, Belgium, and of course the Netherlands. I lived in an amazing student house with students from all over Europe and the rest of the world. I learned things you cannot read in a book. Studying abroad taught me what it means to be alive and it is the best thing that has ever happened to me.</p>
<h2></h2>
<h2>my dreams:</h2>
<div id="attachment_204" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 310px"><a href="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/bruggeBoat.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-204" title="bruggeBoat" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/bruggeBoat-300x225.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="225" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">On a boat in Brugge with Özüm. </p></div>
<p>Living without dreams is like watching a movie with your eyes closed. Here is what I want to do in the future:</p>
<p>First, I&#8217;m planning to graduate from college. This isn&#8217;t terribly ambitious, but it is important. After college I dream that I will be able to either work for myself as a freelance web developer or that I will establish a trusted relationship with a great company that will allow me to telecommute rather than coming in to an office every day.</p>
<p>Once I have a steady income without being tied down to a physical location, I want to see the world. I want to travel on a budget through South America and Europe. Eventually I want to have my own company and make enough money that I don&#8217;t have to worry about anything. I want to buy a sailboat, learn to sail, and cross the atlantic. I want to buy my own house with lots of beautiful land — maybe in Spain or Italy. I want to have cherry trees and grape fields. I want to fall in love, settle down, and start a wonderful family in a beautiful country. I want to make my own art, to write songs and books and learn to paint. I want to learn lots of laungauges and meet people from countries I&#8217;ve never heard of. I want to do all these things and so much more&#8230;</p>
<p>Well, that&#8217;s all there is. Thanks for reading and best wishes to Haiti.</p>
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		<title>Taco Bell is Cheap and Tasty, Hardly Healthy</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2010/01/taco-bell-is-cheap-and-tasty-hardly-healthy/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2010/01/taco-bell-is-cheap-and-tasty-hardly-healthy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 10 Jan 2010 21:49:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Food]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=160</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If there&#8217;s one thing I&#8217;ve lurnd after kicking around on this planet for the last 21.3 years, it&#8217;s that quality food does not come from a drive-through bargain menu. A typical fast-food experience usually consists of a screwed up order, an interesting interaction with a high school drop-out, and a basket of food which tastes [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div id="attachment_187" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 310px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-187" title="Christine" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/Christine-300x296.jpg" alt="Eat Taco Bell and you can look like Christine too!" width="300" height="296" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Eat Taco Bell and you can look like Christine too!</p></div>
<p>If there&#8217;s one thing I&#8217;ve lurnd after kicking around on this planet for the last 21.3 years, it&#8217;s that quality food does not come from a drive-through bargain menu. A typical fast-food experience usually consists of a screwed up order, an interesting interaction with a high school drop-out, and a basket of food which tastes like salty cardboard (not that I&#8217;ve actually eaten salty cardboard).</p>
<p>That being so, there are many times when I&#8217;m hungry and can&#8217;t afford quality food. During said times, I often find myself reluctantly headed towards taco bell to order several of the 6 vegetarian-esque options from their value menu. I usually have no complaints. I end up with a three piece, 890 calorie meal for 2 bucks and some change, a pretty good dollar to calorie ratio. In addition, it usually tastes okay, does not make me sick (usually), and is overall a much better experience than I could obtain at any of their competitor&#8217;s dining establishments.</p>
<p>This was all fine and good until recently, when taco bell decided to jump on Subway&#8217;s Jared bandwagon and tout their fresco-style food items under a new marketing campaign deemed “the drive through diet.” This seemed too&#8230; fake&#8230; to be true, so I hopped on the good old inter-web to get the scoop.</p>
<div id="attachment_189" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-189 " title="driveThruDiet" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/driveThruDiet-300x225.jpg" alt="The don't look as good in real life." width="300" height="225" /><p class="wp-caption-text">They don&#39;t look as good in real life.</p></div>
<p>Here&#8217;s the story: Subway had Jared. He was kind of nerdy, wore glasses, ate lots of sandwiches, and always walked around holding up an enormous pair of pants which he used to wear. Taco Bell stole that idea, fed it some steroids, and brought us Christine.</p>
<p>According to the campaign, Christine started choosing Fresco items from the Drive Through Diet menu and &#8216;making other sensible choices.&#8217; She cut her daily calorie consumption down to a measly 1,250 (62.5 % of the recommended daily value) for the short period of 2 years, and was able to drop 54 whole pounds, reaching her current weight where she looks quite pleasant (IMO) in a swimsuit. Amazing, right?</p>
<p>What Christine shows us is that if we eat 63% of what we are supposed to eat, we can lose half a pound each week, even if we sometimes go to taco bell!</p>
<p>Taco Bell&#8217;s claim here is really quite weak. Where Jared supposedly ate Subway twice a day, we have no idea how often Christine ate Taco Bell. All we know is that she chose Fresco items while also making other sensible choices. For all we know Christine could have eaten Taco Bell once a year while dieting and exercising normally.</p>
<div id="attachment_190" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 310px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-190" title="Christine2" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/Christine2-300x296.jpg" alt="Simply diet for two years and you will lose weight too!" width="300" height="296" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Simply diet for two years and you will lose weight too!</p></div>
<p>Furthermore, this campaign is overflowing with disclaimers. At the bottom of the page detailing Christine&#8217;s story, we notice a disclaimer beginning with “Drive-Thru-Diet is not a weight-loss program.” A bit further down we see the warning “Not a low calorie food.”</p>
<p>Apparently, the diet items can reduce calories by 20 – 100 calories per item. Interestingly enough, this is the same amount of calories you will save by asking for no cheese and no sour-cream. Indeed, Taco Bell did not engineer some crazy new diet food for us to stuff our mouths with. Instead, they are charging us the same price for our food, keeping our cheese and sour-cream, throwing in some extra tomatoes, and telling us it will turn us into swim-suit models. Actually, asking for a regular item without cheese is sometimes healthier than the fresco option, according to their on-line calorie calculator. Oh, how I love marketing.</p>
<p>When all is said and done, Taco Bell tastes pretty good. Their prices are even better. But, can we please not confuse this stuff with health food?  Taco Bell is good for one thing: feeding cheap ass food to poor people like myself. They need to drop this diet gig and stick to what they&#8217;re good at.</p>
<p>Check out a few of the diets below which I threw together. Perhaps Christine should have tried the pure pizza diet, or maybe the cold-stone ice-cream only diet.</p>
<h3>Hefty Diet: (7.2lbs of food per day!)</h3>
<p><em>This diet is what I imagine a big guy would eat in a day if he ate 3-4 meals per day at Taco Bell, and was forced to stick to the Fresco Menu</em><br />
3 Fresco Bean Burritos<br />
6 Fresco Steak Burrito Supreme<br />
9 Fresco Grilled Chicken Soft Tacos</p>
<h3>Average Diet: (3.3lbs of food per day)</h3>
<p><em>This diet is the amount you would have to eat each day if you wanted to stick to the fresco menu, and consume the recommended daily average of 2,000 calories</em><br />
1 Fresco Bean Burrito<br />
3 Fresco Steak Burrito Supreme<br />
4 Fresco Grilled Chicken Soft Tacos</p>
<h3>Pizza Hut Diet:(1.5lbs of food per day)</h3>
<p><em>This diet is what you could eat each day if you wanted to consume as many calories as Christine while only eating pizza hut pizza</em><br />
7 slices of Vegie Lovers Thin Crust Pizza</p>
<h3>Cold Stone Diet:(1.1lbs of food per day)</h3>
<p><em>This diet is what you would have to eat each day if you wanted to consume the same amount of calories as Christine, while eating nothing other than Cold Stone Cake Batter Ice Cream</em><br />
18oz of Coldstone Cake-Batter Ice Cream</p>
<h3>Christine Diet: (1.7lbs of food per day)</h3>
<p><em>This diet is what Christine would have eaten each day if she ate only taco-bell fresco items and kept her daily calories at 1250, her official daily calorie intake.</em><br />
2 Fresco Bean Burritos<br />
1 Fresco Chicken Burrito Supreme<br />
1 Fresco Soft Taco<br />
6 pieces of chewing gum (for the extra 30 calories and to help with hunger pangs)</p>
<h3>Totals:</h3>
<p>Here we have the Nutrition facts for each of the diets described above&#8230;</p>
<table border="0">
<tbody>
<tr>
<th></th>
<th>Grams</th>
<th>Cal</th>
<th>Fat</th>
<th>Sat. Fat</th>
<th>Trans Fat</th>
<th>Sodium</th>
<th>Carbs</th>
<th>Fiber</th>
<th>Sugar</th>
<th>Protien</th>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Hefty:</td>
<td>3296</td>
<td>4560</td>
<td>108</td>
<td>35</td>
<td>1</td>
<td>18520</td>
<td>659</td>
<td>100</td>
<td>61</td>
<td>240</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Average:</td>
<td>1474</td>
<td>2020</td>
<td>48</td>
<td>16</td>
<td>0.5</td>
<td>8250</td>
<td>291</td>
<td>43</td>
<td>27</td>
<td>107</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Pizza Hut:</td>
<td>695</td>
<td>1260</td>
<td>42</td>
<td>17.5</td>
<td>0</td>
<td>3640</td>
<td>161</td>
<td>7</td>
<td>28</td>
<td>49</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Cold Stone:</td>
<td>510</td>
<td>1246</td>
<td>67</td>
<td>42</td>
<td>2.3</td>
<td>630</td>
<td>148</td>
<td>0</td>
<td>114</td>
<td>18</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Christine:</td>
<td>780</td>
<td>1220</td>
<td>31</td>
<td>10</td>
<td>0</td>
<td>4620</td>
<td>184</td>
<td>33</td>
<td>14</td>
<td>52</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Daily Values:</td>
<td>N/A</td>
<td>2000</td>
<td>65</td>
<td>20</td>
<td>0</td>
<td>2400</td>
<td>300</td>
<td>25</td>
<td>N/A</td>
<td>50</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
<p>The point here is that if you cut your calorie intake down to 60-some percent of what it ought to be, you&#8217;re going to lose weight. No matter if you eat purely ice-cream or purely pizza, a 1250 calorie diet is going to result in weight-loss. Clearly, this doesn&#8217;t make for a healthy diet. Instead of making you healthy, a taco-bell diet would lead to a severely malnourished individual, and as we saw above, is about as good for you as eating nothing but pizza.</p>
<p>There&#8217;s nothing wrong with including taco-bell in your starving student food repertoire, just don&#8217;t pretend you&#8217;re eating healthy.</p>
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		<title>I Lurnd Chase is another Sleezy Corporation</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2009/12/i-lurnd-chase-is-another-sleezy-corporation/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2009/12/i-lurnd-chase-is-another-sleezy-corporation/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 20 Dec 2009 03:04:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=149</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
This blog is not associated with any of the organizations mentioned, and should not be construed as representing any of their view points.
When most people think of a corporation, giving back to the community is hardly the first thing that comes to mind. Instead, people might think of an evil, out of control, conglomeration of [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-153" title="corp" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/corp-300x194.jpg" alt="corp" width="300" height="194" /></p>
<p><em>This blog is not associated with any of the organizations mentioned, and should not be construed as representing any of their view points</em>.</p>
<p>When most people think of a corporation, giving back to the community is hardly the first thing that comes to mind. Instead, people might think of an evil, out of control, conglomeration of money and power, hell bent on compounding capital at the expense of any living thing which might fall into its path. For this reason, when Chase announced its &#8220;Giving Back to the Community&#8221; <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">contest</span> marketing campaign, it came as a rather pleasant surprise.</p>
<p>Here&#8217;s the rundown on the way things were supposed to take place:</p>
<p>Chase announced their Community Giving Contest &#8211; a multi-round competition said to give away a total of $5 million over the next months. The idea was that facebook users would be allowed 20 votes each, and that these votes would be cast in true democratic fashion, resulting in the top 100 vote recipients being awarded $25,000 each in the first round. Then, in following rounds the winners would get a chance to compete for an additional $1 million. The tag line of this marketing hoax was &#8220;you decide what matters.&#8221;</p>
<p>Unfortunately, the more accurate tag line would have been &#8220;Chase decides what matters.&#8221;</p>
<p>According to a <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/19/us/19charity.html" target="_blank">New York Times article</a>, at least 3 charities were ranking quite highly when Chase stopped allowing access to vote tallies, and then announced the winners. Mysteriously, <a href="http://ssdp.org/index.php">Students for a Sensible Drug Policy</a>, the <a href="http://www.mpp.org/" target="_blank">Marijuana Policy Project</a>, and Justice For All (an anti-abortion group) were silently left out of the contest, despite several charities winning who had dramatically fewer votes when voting tallies were still available.</p>
<p>Chase&#8217;s responses to these allegations have been shady at best. The New York Times said that a Chase representative refused to give any of the vote tallies. In a <a href="http://ssdp.org/documents/Chase-Boycott-Release.pdf">press release</a> from SSDP, executive director Micah Daigle claims to have asked for a reason for SSDP&#8217;s disqualification, only to be told &#8220;I don&#8217;t have any information to give you&#8221; by another Chase representative.</p>
<p><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-151" title="boycot" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/boycot-300x105.jpg" alt="boycot" width="300" height="105" />Supporters of SSDP and the other cheated organizations have responded with a heavy message. Comments on the Chase Community Giving page are full of concerns being voiced by SSDP members and other facebook users who are concerned with the dishonesty behind the campaign. John Mola writes &#8220;Chase&#8217;s unjustified tactics will certainly be a launching point of debate for the drug policy reform movement.&#8221; Several posts later Eugene Johnson asks &#8220;Was it worth it, Chase?&#8221;</p>
<p>In addition to this, SSDP has responded with a <a href="http://ssdp.org/boycott/" target="_blank">campaign to boycott chase</a>. In explaining their boycott, SSDP writes &#8220;Chase used this &#8216;contest&#8217; to promote their brand while misleading the public into thinking that it was a democratic voting process. If Chase can&#8217;t be trusted to treat nonprofits fairly in a charity competition, then they can&#8217;t be trusted to handle our money.&#8221;</p>
<p>Chase has made it clear that they could disqualify participants for any reason. At the end of the New York Times Article mentioned above, a Chase representative is quoted, saying that the 100 finalists &#8220;reflect those organizations that received the most votes among eligible participants.&#8221;</p>
<p>The clear implication here is that SSDP and MPP were never even eligible based on Chase&#8217;s undisclosed and discriminatory criteria. Nonetheless, Chase proceeded to help SSDP participate in their contest, sat by as users spammed each other with the Chase logo, and maintained the illusion of these organizations participation, knowing all the while that they would be kicked out of the competition come awards time.</p>
<p><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-152" title="ssdp" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/ssdp-300x164.jpg" alt="ssdp" width="300" height="164" />If Chase would have had the decency to inform these organizations upfront that they were not allowed to participate because Chase does not agree with their politics, they could have saved face in this marketing campaign. Instead, they sat back and reaped the marketing benefits of these organizations spreading the Chase logo all through facebook, despite the fact that these organizations were never even going to be considered.</p>
<p>Due to Chase&#8217;s actions throughout this campaign, it seems fair to say that they could care less about principles of democracy, honesty, or helping the community. Rather, Chase is just another sleezy corporation, bent on earning money with little regard for anything else.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s great that so many honest and legitimate charities got such nice bonuses this holiday season, but Chase made it clear that they don&#8217;t want to help anyone but themselves, and that the money they awarded was simply a dishonest attempt at improving their public reputation.</p>
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		<title>I Lurnd It&#8217;s Called Soccer</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2009/12/i-lurnd-its-called-soccer/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2009/12/i-lurnd-its-called-soccer/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 04 Dec 2009 23:30:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=138</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[GUSYNJJA6CAT
That&#8217;s right England, I&#8217;m talking to you. You must be aware by now that the greatest country on the planet (probably the greatest country in the universe) was fortunate enough to be matched up against you folks in this little thing called the world cup.
Now, I&#8217;ll be the first to confess that the good ol&#8217; [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div id="attachment_139" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 310px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-139" title="soccer" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/soccer-300x259.jpg" alt="This is how we play Soccer" width="300" height="259" /><p class="wp-caption-text">This is how we play Soccer</p></div>
<p><span>GUSYNJJA6CAT</span></p>
<p>That&#8217;s right England, I&#8217;m talking to you. You must be aware by now that the greatest country on the planet (probably the greatest country in the universe) was fortunate enough to be matched up against you folks in this little thing called the world cup.</p>
<p>Now, I&#8217;ll be the first to confess that the good ol&#8217; U.S.A. is not well known for our sensational soccer skills. But, there is one thing we&#8217;ve gotten pretty good at over the years, that is: kicking red-coat ass.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s right. It might have seemed that we were all buddy-buddy when we pillaged Iraq and Afganistan together, but if you thought that little bit of bush-era brown nosin&#8217; was gonna make us forget about the Tea Act of 1773, think again.</p>
<p>So, in light of our prospective June 12th match up, I&#8217;ve got 3.5 words for you old limeys: It&#8217;s Called Soccer.</p>
<p>Now, I know there are a bunch of liberal scientists and elitist historians out there who might be saying things like &#8220;England spoke English first.&#8221; Well, I&#8217;ve got two things to say about that.</p>
<p>First, It&#8217;s not true. Check the facts. The United States was speaking English long before all those Englishmen came marching around with their guns and claiming the language for themselves.</p>
<p>Secondly, even if it were true, we don&#8217;t care. Here in America, we don&#8217;t listen to those loonies up in their Ivory Tower. Instead, we have democracy, something you Europeans wouldn&#8217;t know much about. Last I checked, the U.S.A. had way more people than England and all of its little islands. According to the rules of democracy, we win. It&#8217;s Called Soccer.</p>
<div id="attachment_140" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-140" title="gotw_football-1" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/gotw_football-1-300x274.jpg" alt="This is what football looks like" width="300" height="274" /><p class="wp-caption-text">This is what football looks like</p></div>
<p>Here in America, when we play football, we get to use hands and feet. Do you know why that is? Because we live in the land of the free. We don&#8217;t have some queen sitting up on her throne telling us which limbs we can or cannot use when we play football.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s right, we love football and freedom, and we&#8217;re so damn free we just combined the two. How does that make you feel?</p>
<p>Now, as if our unique qualities of freedom and democracy were not enough to assure victory, we&#8217;ve got another secret weapon up our sleeve. It&#8217;s called capitalism. Thanks to capitalism, Americans are well acquainted with competition. Not only have our people improved thanks to capitalist competition, but so has our water.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s right. While your sophisticated European government was busy making all these regulations on industry, food, and water, our free-market water was over here competing in true American fashion. The end result? The water we give our athletes boils at 212 degrees, while your socialist water boils at a mere 100 degrees. If your water can&#8217;t stand the heat, get it out of our free-market kitchen.</p>
<p>Now, the academics out there are probably saying &#8220;But 100 degrees is easier to remember than 212. It makes more sense.&#8221;</p>
<p>You guys would say that. Let me tell you something about America. We are not interested in the easy way out. We don&#8217;t need some socialist government to feed us from a spoon.</p>
<div id="attachment_141" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 310px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-141" title="eagle" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/eagle-300x225.jpg" alt="America. Fuck yea." width="300" height="225" /><p class="wp-caption-text">America. Fuck yea.</p></div>
<p>In our great country, we appreciate a little bit of hard work, and true patriots don&#8217;t mind putting in a little extra studying in the memorization department if it means stronger water for our country. So take your socialist water and pass it out to your lazy citizens. We will work for our water, and our water will continue to be the best no matter what the elitist professors say.</p>
<p>So then, you old bunch of Brits, I&#8217;ve got an offer to extend. I&#8217;m not usually a fan of this liberal peace making negotiation business, but I&#8217;m so confident in my country that I&#8217;m willing to bend the rules. Here is the offer:</p>
<p>If you and your bunch of lime-eating, socialist water drinking soccer players are, for some reason, able to beat us on June 12th, we will stop saying soccer and instead call it &#8220;European Football.&#8221;</p>
<p>But, on the other hand, if God continues to side with us and we beat you guys back to the blarney stone, you (and the commonwealth) must admit that football is a man&#8217;s sport played with pads and helmets and that the sport you guys have been calling football is not football at all. It&#8217;s Called Soccer.</p>
<p>Accept this offer and we can end this dispute once and for all.</p>
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		<title>Today, I wrote an essay.</title>
		<link>http://andygroff.com/2009/11/today-i-wrote-an-essay/</link>
		<comments>http://andygroff.com/2009/11/today-i-wrote-an-essay/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 02 Nov 2009 06:49:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Updates]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://andygroff.com/?p=134</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Yup, it&#8217;s true. Today a wrote a really long essay because I was bored. It is mostly about why we should waste less money and re-consider what we consider cool. It is about how powerful our opinions are, and how we can fight back against advertising agencies to re-claim our identities. It is not necessary [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div id="attachment_129" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 247px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-129" title="lacoste_polo_shirt" src="http://andygroff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/lacoste_polo_shirt-237x300.jpg" alt="Only $92.00 for this very average polo shirt." width="237" height="300" /><p class="wp-caption-text">Only $92.00 for this very average polo shirt.</p></div>
<p>Yup, it&#8217;s true. Today a wrote a really long essay because I was bored. It is mostly about why we should waste less money and re-consider what we consider cool. It is about how powerful our opinions are, and how we can fight back against advertising agencies to re-claim our identities. It is not necessary that we identify with brands. Instead, lets identify with a desire to make the world a better place, to share art, and to travel around and make friends. It makes for a much more meaningful existence than identifying with ed-hardy designs. Trust me. It&#8217;s true. (sorry if the essay offends you)</p>
<p>Here is what I wrote about it on my &#8220;essays&#8221; page:</p>
<blockquote>
<p style="padding-left: 60px;">This is an essay I wrote for no particular reason, except that people’s decisions to waste money began to annoy me a bit. This essay will certainly be unpopular. Among its claims: girls should stop wearing make-up, we should spend way less money on weddings, and most of all we should stop buying name brand crap and walking around like we are moving billboards. Its not meant to offend, just to hopefully make people re-consider what makes something valuable.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Thats it. You can navigate to the essay with the menu above or just click <a href="http://andygroff.com/essays/what-you-think-is-cool-will-destroy-or-save-the-world/" target="_self">here</a>.</p>
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